Thursday, August 25, 2016

Even Painful Days Are Good



To the person who hurt me yesterday.
I will forgive you.
It might take me a little while.  
I'm only human.  I'm not magic.
I can't just snap my fingers and feel all better.  But I will get there.
It's a commandment to forgive.  
It's also a commandment not to go around hurting people--
telling stories that aren't true.
I will forgive you for not having enough integrity to come to me and talk to me yourself.  
I will get over you doing this to me--again.  
I want you to know it hurts,
and if you wanted to be my friend,
you wouldn't have done it.
I will forgive you,
but we can't be friends.
Friends don't do what you did.


To my friend, Joan.
The world lost you to cancer a year and a half ago.
It's not fair.  You're gone.  
You were too young. You understood me.
We laughed a lot.  You were smart and got my jokes.
We liked to talk about words in the dictionary and Shakespeare.
Who does that?  Nerds?  
Well, we did and I miss that.  No one else could ever be you.
You taught me so much, I will always be in your debt.
I'm glad you're not in pain anymore and that you're strong and healthy again. 
But it's not the same without you. 
Tell the angels "hi" for me.
Love you.


To my friend, Angie.
Thank heaven for you.  We've had so much fun!  
You inspire me to work hard, to reach high and work hard to reach any goal, 
How to be happy.
I always feel better after spending time with you.  
Thank you for your testimony, for your love of God and your good example.  
You are a gem and a joy.
Love you.


To my friend, Bonnie.
You're heaven sent. 
Twenty years ago we became friends and it's been a blessing to me every single day.  
Thank you for getting me.  For knowing how to teach me.  
For helping me be a good mother and wife.
For being the example I was missing in my life.
For being the most loyal friend a girl could ever have.  
For taking care of me when I've been sick.
All the Diet Coke runs and lunches of tostadas and chips and salsa.  
But mostly for being the older sister I always wished I had.  
Love to you.

I love you all.  



To my children, Al and Ains.
You are miracles.  
Truly, gifts from God Himself.  
Thank you for your examples of love and courage,
creativity and spunk, intellect and humility,
grace and strength, wisdom and testimony.
It's a privilege to be your mother.  
I have loved every minute of watching you grow.
Every stage has been a pure delight.  
And now you're grown, you are my friends.
It's the best feeling in the world, to enjoy my children so much.  
Love and blessings for you, forever.
You have my heart.
Forever, I will wub you mahups.  




To my love, John.
My champion and my hero.
My best friend.
My favorite person in the whole world.
The man who took a risk by loving a girl who didn't know who she was 
and turned her into a woman with a future and a smile.  
A bright and happy future with a beautiful family.  
There will never be words for what you've done for me 
or to say or show how much I love you.
You are the sand and I am the sea.
You are the earth between my toes and the rock that keeps me standing.  
You make me smile and you make me happy.
You have given me two beautiful children and a life
that I could have never have imagined when I was younger.
I always want to be with you, forever and always.  
I love you.  Always.




To my Savior and Redeemer.
You really did all that for me?  And you have never given up on me?  And never will?  
You suffered for my sins and felt all my pain and sorrow and then you died for me,
just so I could be with you again someday and with my family? 
You paid the price for my mistakes so I could be redeemed? 
Because you love me.
Because you said you would.
Because you kept your promise.
Because you are always true.
I love you.  I need you.  I don't deserve you.
But I lean on you, all the time, and you're probably tired.
I know you're always there for me.
Thank you.  It seems dumb to say thank you, but I'm so grateful.
I hope I know you when I see you.
I want so much to be true to you.  


To my Heavenly Father.
I can't wait for the day I get to see your face and remember who you are.
I want to be good so I know you.
You love me.
Please help me be strong.
Sometimes life is hard, but then again, you already know that.
Thank you for all my blessings.
For all the people in my life who have helped me and even those who have hurt me.
They have all helped me to know you better in one way or another.
I love you.  



Tomorrow will be better.
I just know it will.
My bed will hide me tonight until the sun comes up.
My dog will lick my face, saying "good morning!"
My kids will send me funny Snapchats and my husband will kiss and hold me.
I'll work hard and I'll smile.
It will be a good day.  Even a great day.
Because I'm so blessed and I have everything I need.
What a miracle my life really is.
Even painful days are good,
because I remember what's most important:
My God, my marriage, my family, and my friends.
And it's always a good day
when you see a little more clearly,
and you come to know who is really your friend
and who would never, ever hurt you.
Yes, even the painful days are good.



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